“Easy” is never a word I’d use to describe our relationship. From the very beginning things were hard. We started talking in the heat of his tennis season - aka he had practice until 11 pm every night. He’d knock on my door at 11:30 so we could spend a few hours on opposite sides of the couch (we didn’t have our first kiss for 3 months!!!) discussing & watching the newest show on Netflix. I’d be in bed no earlier than 2 AM and then wake up early to cram for an exam or finish my homework. I think this was the year I truly learned the definition of “tired.” 😂 All throughout college, he’d leave every summer and winter to go back home to Germany. On top of the fact that I worked at a summer camp without any access to my phone for 6/7 days a week, we also had a 7 hour time difference. (Sitting here now, I’m not entirely sure how we managed to pull this off. I guess I’m just glad we did! 😂💗) When I finished school & he finished his masters, things got really hard. He had a job offer back home to get his Doctorate and I had no desire to leave the US. Because of this, we split up for about 2 months to figure out if we could do life without one another. To keep a very long (and heartbreaking) story short: Thankfully, we couldn’t. We decided to try long distance once again - this time for about a year and a half. Lukas and I were surprisingly good at long distance. Sure, I spent many, many nights in tears and we had our moments of doubts, but somehow we managed. We’d trade off visits every 3 months or so — this only possible due to the incredible flexibility of my job & my parent’s financial assistance. After about a year or so apart, LK started talking about his upcoming research placement in London. It wasn’t long into these convos that we decided maybe our next step would be made together in the UK. It was the single scariest decision of my life. I quit a job I loved, packed my bags & said more tearful goodbyes than I’d ever wanted. But finally, we were together. In London I cried a heck of a lot of tears, started arguments just because & simply wanted to go home many, many times. Change was HARD... but it ended up being the best decision I’ve ever made. London was truly a dream.
After 6 months, we moved to Germany — to his hometown: Stuttgart. 4 months in & ya girl still finds tears to cry every now & then. It’s quite lonely here some days. Friends have been very difficult to find & my German classes are definitely not for the faint at heart. BUT it’s getting easier. Finally.
We often spend our nights together on the balcony with a glass of wine. I never dreamed we’d be here discussing the 20 min speech I gave in German or the next country we plan to vacation in. Life is quite funny sometimes.
I have said more than a few times: “Oh how I wish this could just be easy.” But one thing I know: Through the highs & the lows, the good & the bad — We’re easily stronger than ever before.
Love & life aren’t easy, but it sure is worth it.
As for the next chapter, I can hardly wait. (See what I did there? 😋)
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